to my precious baby boy, max powers, the story of your childhood

Dear Max,

It has been 10 months since I’ve written. That was a lifetime ago! 10 months ago I was sitting in our Astoria, Queens apartment. It would have been cold and I wouldn’t have wanted to go outside much. But I was going out as often as possible with my friends, hanging out at our apartments or cafes or wherever we could go and not freeze.

Today I’m sitting on our couch looking out at our yard. There’s a sunken sailboat to the side. In front of it is our hammock, and we’ve got an outdoor living set, as well. Beyond that is lush greenery for a ways out, and then the ocean. We were in one of the busiest cities in the world, surrounded by everything one could want. Now we are in the most remote part of the world, living on Maui, Hawaii. So much has happened that it overwhelms me. So instead of trying to write everything out, I’ll instead post my major tweets (I wonder how ancient Twitter will seem to you by the time you can read this?).

About to experience Christmas cheer overload. Flying to Cali, Max mtg Grandparents Powers for 1st time, we meeting Sarah’s fiancee 1st time!

December 24, 2009 9:53:43 AM HST via web

And so excited to be in Sarah and Matt’s wedding in March! Another trip to Cali, get to play dress-up, and see them joined for life!

December 28, 2009 5:05:24 PM HST via Twitterrific

It was January 1st that I took a pregnancy test and it came out positive. With you it was utter shock that I was pregnant. When I took this one, I sat and waited for the little line to turn pink, affirming my suspicions. Not that there was really any sign other than a sore throat and feeling a little wiped out. We called our family and told them, and around your birthday told many of our friends. We wanted prayer, since I was particularly scared about postpartum depression rearing again.

Luv that a sweet old man stopped us -in the x-walk- to wave at Max & smile, then yelled “go ahead & cross, get the hell out of the x-walk!”

January 8, 2010 7:57:07 AM HST via Twitterrific

My baby was borned one year ago today! Have been some very rough times, but I wouldn’t trade him for the world! Happy birthday Max Powers!!!

January 13, 2010 1:36:02 AM HST via Twitterrific

Grandma and Grandpa Snider and aunt Jenny came to visit for a week over your birthday. You were horribly sick on your actual birthday, but were happy and healthy for your birthday party that Saturday.

Max totally sick for his birthday. At least he has grandma & grandpa Snider & auntie Jenny are in town, and party Saturday!

January 13, 2010 4:48:21 PM HST via Twitterrific

I don’t know why we didn’t take more photos, but this YouTube video was part of your uncle Dave’s vlog. It features you’re birthday! Super-Duper 1st Birthday For Max Powers!

Sad my mama & family left. But thankful they were here, & for those who came yesterday to give love to my most precious son!

January 17, 2010 6:29:18 AM HST via Twitterrific

We all went to the doctor for an ultrasound. I was about 7 weeks pregnant. But when the doctor looked, everything was there… except the baby. No heartbeat.  The doctor said it was possible it was too early to tell, but I was pretty sure it was gone. I cried a bit in the office.

Thought we’d have exciting news 2 share 2day. +preggo test 3 wks ago, today found out nothing’s growing in there. Not God’s time yet.

January 21, 2010 3:43:59 PM HST via web

Cheesy tweet: loving my friends & family, watching Sesame St w/ Max, and planning my trip to Florida in 2-1/2 weeks for r&r w/ Elizabeth!

January 22, 2010 5:06:06 AM HST via Twitterrific

An earthquake devastated  Haiti.  Such a sad thing for a nation already full of poverty that hasn’t been given much of a break.

Trying to get through to #HopeForHaitiNow.org – glad the lines are full! Call 1-877-994-2484

January 22, 2010 3:52:11 PM HST via web

Should clarify there’s a *chance* I’m still pregnant, but the Dr’s not optimistic. Feel free to pray for a miracle so we can point to Jesus!

January 23, 2010 10:10:08 AM HST via Twitterrific

But if I’m not, we know that our God is a God of life, and He WILL answer our prayers as He sees fit. No matter what, we can point to Jesus!

January 23, 2010 10:26:29 AM HST via Twitterrific

Jason to Max: “You have all these toys and you’re playing with a diaper and a bra… is this foreshadowing of your wild days to come?”

January 23, 2010 1:42:35 PM HST via web

Max just took his 1st 5 steps in a row. It was a magical moment. For @jayjaypowpow. I was on the toilet. But we filmed his next 50+.

January 24, 2010 4:13:12 PM HST via Twitterrific

Here’s the YouTube video of Max’s First Steps!

You are now running around, such a little boy!

No baby in my belly, d&c mañana to remove dead tissue. God is good, no need to feel sorry for us. Max will get a sibling in due time.

January 27, 2010 9:26:05 AM HST via Twitterrific

Because I wasn’t pregnant, but there was dead tissue and a placenta and yolk sac still growing, I had the option of waiting to see if it came out on it’s own or having a D&C done (an abortion, except there was nothing to abort, just pulling out everything out). I opted for the D&C because you and I were going to visit Elizabeth and Judah in Florida less than 2 weeks later, and I didn’t want to risk going to a Florida ER.

Plus, 4 friends had babies last night. How can I be too sad when there’s so much life? Congrats Katy & Kristian, Heather & Owen!

January 27, 2010 9:39:21 AM HST via Twitterrific

The 4 snowflakes on the ground were definitely worth every news outlet using most of their airtime to warn us about the huge snow storm.

February 6, 2010 6:07:26 AM HST via Twitterrific

Been worried because Max doesn’t like to eat his vegetables. Then J pointed out I don’t like to eat mine, & I spend all day with him. D’oh!

February 6, 2010 4:48:38 PM HST via web

Leaving on a jet plane. Taking my baby 2 Florida 4 the week 2 play with his 1st best bud, Judah, & I 2 play w/ 1 of my best buds, Elizabeth!

February 8, 2010 7:43:51 AM HST via Twitterrific

Max charged up & down aisle of plane, a wave of people turned 2 smile as he waved & stopped 2 talk. One lady said he should be president.

February 8, 2010 1:25:00 PM HST via Twitterrific

Experiencing some crazy awesome southern hospitality! About to eat a meal with 12 people at the table, asked if I wanted to ride a horse.

February 9, 2010 12:49:07 PM HST via Twitterrific

Heading to Shephard’s Beach Resort @ Clearwater Beach, apparently THE party place in Central FL. With toddlers. Beer bongs and baby bongs!!!

February 10, 2010 7:41:24 AM HST via Twitterrific

Going to bed, knocked lamp over. Glass & drink everywhere. Woke Max. He screamed. Woke Judah. Both screaming. Glass still everywhere. Ugh.

February 10, 2010 7:03:48 PM HST via Twitterrific

We had a great time with Liz and Judah. Spent a few days at her hometown in central Florida. Her family was amazing, did great cooking for us. They own a bed and breakfast, have horses, etc. So easy to talk to. Liz and I took you and Judah to Clearwater Beach, a cute little tourist town. We were hoping for some R&R. We hadn’t thought of how the two of us with our two kids would be like each of us being a single mom together. It was also very cold – something we weren’t entirely prepared for. Nonetheless, seeing Liz and her family was amazing, and you and Judah had a great time. We took advantage of the buffet at the beach, picking out all the grapes and strawberries for you and Judah. It was the off-season at the party hotel we were at, so we didn’t have to worry about any spring break craziness.

We got home February 13th, so I could spend Valentines Day with your daddy. Your uncle Dave babysat you.

Just got back from an A-Maze-Ing dinner at The View, a revolving restaraunt on 48th floor over Times Square. My love done did goooood!

February 14, 2010 6:08:23 PM HST via Twitterrific

The little bump that you were born with, your “horn”, as we called it, was scheduled to be removed February 16th. It was scary seeing my baby go into surgery, even though I knew it would be ok.

Realized that Max’s horn removal is at 6AM tomorrow. Feel like someone hit my panic button. Simple procedure, but my baby’s having surgery!

February 15, 2010 11:15:57 AM HST via web

Wish my waiting room had been so cool! http://yfrog.com/au175wj

February 16, 2010 1:13:11 AM HST via Twitterrific

Just lay my son on the surgical table until he fell asleep. In the cafeteria to keep my mind off it. E. River view: http://yfrog.com/2eptuij

February 16, 2010 3:04:00 AM HST via Twitterrific

Max is out, doing great! Was just a little cyst. Wanted daddy. http://yfrog.com/331jrdlj

February 16, 2010 3:57:44 AM HST via Twitterrific

Hardest Lent ever: giving up TV (excepting LOST on Tuesdays). But more time to spend with God, excited to read and cleaning house!

February 17, 2010 2:00:38 PM HST via Twitterrific

Slept in my pajamas last night. Wore them all day. Wearing them tonight. 36+ hours, and don’t feel a bit bad about it today!

February 17, 2010 6:56:10 PM HST via web

Suddenly missing Seattle a ton.

February 19, 2010 4:19:14 PM HST via web

The end of February, I believe the 26th, uncle Dave moved back to California and we had a going-away dinner at Johns Pizza in Times Square.  That night your daddy and I sat down to discuss where we wanted to live. We’d been thinking about California and Seattle, WA, even Portland, OR. But the more we talked, the more we realized we really wanted to live in Hawaii. So we made the decision that night to do it. I then did a lot of research, deciding between Oahu, where we could live near Honolulu, and Maui. We decided on Maui. We told our families and some of our closest friends. We waited the longest to tell some of our closest friends in New York because we knew how upset some would be, and wanted to preserve good times untainted by the knowledge we would soon be leaving. It was especially hard because the day we decided to go was the day I met my amazing friend, Michelle. Fortunately she’s just an amazing human being with 3 boys (and now a girl on the way!) and has lived on Oahu, so she was always so supportive and we hung out often before we left.

What BRILLIANT (and, imo, HOT!) designer created this infographic, now #5 on digg.com, but is being shy about it? http://tinyurl.com/yzvn8hj

February 22, 2010 6:39:10 PM HST via web

Been giving my son carrot juice cut with fruit juice. Turns out he loves it straight. Eww!

March 1, 2010 7:49:46 AM HST via Twitterrific

You and I went to California on our own for almost a week. Your Papa and Nana Kyllo were visiting friends out in Roseville, so we stayed with them for a few nights. Then Grandma and Grandpa Powers came to have dinner with us all, and took you and I back to Grass Valley with them. We got to relax – and I got to sleep in while grandma got you up most mornings! – and help get ready for your aunt Sarah and uncle Matt’s wedding. Daddy joined us a couple days before. I was a bridesmaid, and you were just adorable. You danced on the dance floor and at one point a circle of people formed with you in the center, clapping. You were in your own world. Once you realized everyone was watching you, though, you ran away, scared.

Another solo trip with my baby. Laguardia to Houston to Sacramento. Max is teething and we have window seats. Oy! Prayer needed!!!

March 4, 2010 6:01:17 AM HST via web

Dear God, thank you for available aisle seats! No thanks for the loud flight attendant who awoke Max after an hour! Boo.

March 4, 2010 1:16:34 PM HST via Twitterrific

Back after whirlwind trip to Cali. Family, mo family, wedding prep, marrying off sis-in-law, looong plane rides. Good times.

March 18, 2010 5:41:51 AM HST via Twitterrific

To be continued…

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